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Six Ways to Celebrate Your New Engagement


- With giant yellow donuts:

Mmmm. Doooonuts.


- With "lots" and "lots" of "hearts."

"Perfect."


- By planning ahead.

Way, way, WAY ahead.


- By stressing the importance of family:

Actually, Darth Vader fighting Luke in honor of an impending marriage is kind of awesome. Let's just hope your in-laws have a good sense of humor.

(And make sure the baby shower cake looks like this.)


- By comparing your new life together to violently killing things:

"Here we see the groom taking aim at his violently diarrheatic bride-to-be.

"Ah, young love."

(Don't worry, kids; he's only going to tranq her 'til the green diarrhea stops.)


Or, of course, there's always the old standby:

- A syrupy sweet public display of affection that'll leave your guests sick to their stomachs:

"Dude. Some of us are trying to eat over here!"


Thanks to Sandy S., Abbey A., Matthew W., Rachel C., Naomi H., & Jule Ann H., who are so syrupy sweet they should be on a stack of pancakes.


But I am not advocating cannibalism.